Imagine it’s a warm sunny day.
And you are driving into your neighborhood, staring at those gorgeous houses and thinking how nice would it be to live here. Or imagine you met one of your old pal Lolly, who is a successful writer now.
And you begin comparing or what I call merging your life with hers, and without wasting no time you start tormenting yourself with thoughts like.
“Oh, I wish I had a career like her”
“Oh, I wish I had the enthusiasm like her”
“Oh, I wish I had a house like her” and you didn’t recognize how many times they have popped inside your worrisome mind.
And thereby, you drop your shoulders, fill your eyes with pain and sorrow, even drop your head feeling discouraged or demotivated and so ready to give up.
But before you do anything like that hon.
Can I ask you something?
Do you really recognize such thoughts or like a normal person you ignore them since that’s the easy way out, a path of least resistance, I say
“umm. I didn’t hear you what? ignore?”
Well, Okayyy! then grasshopper. Let’s understand why the heck you ignore the most fundamental thing that wanders a lot in our minds.
Shall we?
Why you should stop comparing yourself to others?
A) We are powerless over how we have been made.
Can you make your eyes a little bigger? Can you make your legs a little longer? Can you make your eyelashes grow? Can you change your skin color? Can you make your fingers slimmer or long?
Only except if you are hooked on watching videos that transform skin color in just 10 minutes, grow eyelashes with Vaseline in just 2 minutes, make eyes look bigger with makeup tools in just 15 minutes, and blah blah…
“Because grasshopper, That’s just totally different”
People don’t let people face who they are.
They fill us in with tips on how to be beautiful and attractive and thereby, we end up having low self-esteem and a feeling of “I lack in something” in our lives, and before we know we have already started comparing ourselves to people i.e., what we ordinarily call “comparison trap/comparison game”
Funny right?
Obviously, you will…
Imma joking
We never got this opportunity to make us.
We never got the chance to choose the kind of family we are born into. We never got the chance to choose our looks and physic at birth. We never got the chance to choose the way we talk, walk, speak, etc.
And I call this “Our bad”
I have been an acne lover since 7th class (umm… I didn’t want to use the term, suffer)
And that’s why my every illustration has it too.
I feel I never cared about it much until someone paved the way for me to look at my flaws or when someone else started comparing themselves to me at first and I found out about the faultiness in myself.
That something’s wrong with me and I need to fix it and back then whenever I used to see some random people on the streets with plain skin. I used to feel “They are so damn lucky. Do they even know how lucky they are to have that type of skin?”
and this was one of the negative effects I had on myself i.e., self-doubt.
But it’s been many years now and I’m at peace with myself. I have learned to love my face and my body. And I feel how could I have ever pointed onto myself. How dare I did that to myself. I feel so sorry.
I am sorry body
but still, we often feel very uncomfortable in accepting what’s real. We want perfection because we see perfection in people.
Most of us have compared ourselves to a friend, colleague, or even a celebrity, in a quest to figure out “how we’re doing”. Yes! People with beautiful skin, people with long legs, people with modern family, people with pretty fingers, and blah blah to our non-ending thoughts to compare.
But I will not bore you by telling you to just ignore or forget about it (which you obviously did) as we will learn to accept after recognizing it.
That it’s okay to be slim or fat or black or white because happiness can be found anywhere at any corner of this pretty world. It’s just you have to learn to work with it not against it in your lives.
Back then if I would have focused more on my class tests rather than staring at those random people, I may have gotten an A in social studies class tests or assignments, as I used to suck at that lol.
B) You can’t compare a mango with an orange.
Continue reading:)))